What’s going on when someone speaks your name?
Sometimes I’ll ask a client about their name. “Where does it come from?” The question itself assumes it comes from somewhere. As if there is a story behind it. Tell me a story about your name. Or a particular meaning. Were you named after somebody (in particular)? Do you know why? How does your name feel to you? – when you hear it spoken? – when you see your signature
I’ve had clients, also friends and acquaintances, who decide to change their name legally. One friend had, to me, a wonderfully powerful-sounding name, with family energy to it. But that heritage had betrayed him – then he ritually obtained a Native American name – which gave him an identity that contained, for him, more integrity and healing.
Given
Traditionally, one’s name is given at birth. For one, that means we don’t choose it for ourselves. It’s given to us from outside.. I’ve never encountered a situation where one names themselves.1
In my Christian heritage, Holy Baptism is the traditional Naming ceremony. An Officiant may say, “Name this child (or person).” In a traditional Christian Baptism, the officiant may turn to the parents, sponsors, or other presenters, with the directive, “Name this child.” Then parents or other sponsors speak the person’s name (perhaps the first time the full name is spoken).
Then the Officiant speaks, “(Name), I Baptize you in the Name of The Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit ” The Name of the individual is united (ritually sealed) with the triune Name of God. I’ll come back to this later.
Being Called (by name)
I recall back in the ‘70’s being drawn into something I couldn’t quite define, by Harry Chapin’s song,“ Someone Keeps Calling My Name.
The chorus was
Someone keeps calling my name . Or is it just the rustlin’ of the wind?
Or is it just that I need a friend? Someone keeps calling my name, my name
And then he and his band would keep coming up with new and various ‘story verses’ (his specialty).
Divining your name
Some cultures believe one’s name has a specific origin, or is given, before birth. Divining that name is an ancient practice that considers that a baby is named from somewhere else – that there’s an instilled identity from before its earthly birth. This can allow the child, at birth, to be immediately welcomed (to its new home) by name. I’ve read of African traditions, where before birth, select elders will gather to ‘divine’ the child’s name (which often can foretell it’s life purpose), so at birth, the child can be immediately greeted by name.
One’s name can contain a tremendous reservoir of influence and power.
Once in a while, I’ll ask a client, “Do you have any idea who (or what) you were born to be?” – a question which sometimes reveals a “well it seems that…” answer.
Samuel and Eli (and me)
Now the old preacher in me easily looks to the Old Testament account of the young boy Samuel and the old Priest, Eli (I Samuel Ch 3), where on three separate nights, God calls the boy by name, and finally Eli realizes it is God who is calling the boy, and instructs him how to respond.
Three times in my own life, I’ve heard my name distinctly called out of nowhere, “Bill”, and thought of Samuel – though nothing came of it, probably an hallucination, and no ‘old priest’ around to direct me otherwise, lol.
One Christian elucidation and argument for Baptism is that you are thereby given a name by which God knows how to call you, or will know you, at least when you show up at the heavenly gates.
For me, there’s an ‘earthly logic’ that would advise us to get baptized – like don’t drive without insurance. But the ‘divine logic’ of the Biblical God, in my view and experience, is of a different nature – ‘rules’ can be for guidance or direction, but not for judgment. Or perhaps it’s both, and we are individually called out in between for a course correction
Sometimes I’ll muse on what a marriage can do to names. It’s like having a wooden container-tray, half-filled with square wooden name blocks. At the wedding ritual, the box is ritually shaken up, and eventually each block lines up in a new place and order. Same names, quite different order.
A Bridge Between
Often in the prayers of my church, the Almighty is addressed as the “maker of heaven and earth.” And that dual creative dimension of one’s origin, now emerges as a deep meaning level of having a Name.
In the Genesis account of Creation, Adam is given the task of naming everything. Every species and family of species is given a name. But when it comes to humans, each individual human is given their own Name.
So, when we are given our own name, we inherit that fulcrum, or ‘bridge’ space between ‘heaven and earth.’ And it can be said that both our divine and earthly life purposes are hidden just beneath – waiting now to be wrestled out.
A friend of mine was recently Baptized (as an adult). And she exclaimed to me with wonder – that before she was lowered into the water, “They read out my entire name!”
As a therapist, it’s quite frequent that the ages of those who walk in my door, individuals and couples, are somewhere around ‘middle age’ (often just around age fifty). It’s finally time to ‘get it together’ to finally discern “who I really am.” Who am I really born to be? Or, as I recently read, “To find your way back home to who you really are.”
When we are born, we’re given our full Name. Then we die, we are called (back home?). And there are times and circumstances in between which may be called or experienced as course corrections.
The Adventure…
I’ll be sitting in the waiting room of a Dr’s Office, or clinic, or a hospital – waiting for my name to be called. A nurse opens a door and calls out, “William.” Next, I’m asked to confirm my birth date (to my mind, a fascinating congruence of identity) – Then as I’m led down a hall (often with many doors), I can somehow feel, The Adventure of my life now continues or begins here…
Sometimes, it seems it’s always Just Beginning. Having my own Name holds it all together – makes it all Authentic, the real me, Bill.
Come along.
Footnote
1 Wasn’t it Napoleon, who at his Coronation as Emperor in Notre Dame Cathedral (1804), grabbed the crown to place it on his head by himself? Can you spell Waterloo? And in our own day……
March 27, 2026